Saturday, March 15, 2008

Where's the Beach?

I came to Virginia Beach when I was 10 to visit my uncle Jim Bob (aka, Max Hurl Williams - one of the people for whom my son, Max, is named...) and we had a great time! Crabbing, eating HUGE lobsters, running around the beach.

Now I'm sort of tied to the hotel - and if I had a lot of time outside of teaching, I'm afraid I'd be too exhausted - so I'm not beaching it up much. Not a huge loss - I'd turn as red as one of those aforementioned huge lobsters - but it feels odd to be so near the beach and NOT visit.

That's what I get for not renting a car. That 'trapped' feeling. It makes me hesitant to go off with someone to do extra curricular activityes because, heaven forbid, I start to get very tired and want to get back to my hotel room, but there's no ride back right away?

And the forced rest is the best thing in the world for me right now. I sat and knit last night, answered email and did some work, but mostly just knit and thought.

Which is probably why it was difficult for me to sleep. I woke up at 2:30 and couldn't get terrible thoughts out of my mind - thoughts I've been able to banish so far in this adventure - but they came streaming through my mind like so many tiny bats out of a cave. The sound of the wings alone was enough to unsettle me.

Classes
The classes here have been so good - the students are hard working (VERY hard working) and get stuff very quickly. The only problem is that we - myself included - want to chat a lot!

After my two classes yesterday (Mutt-luks and Colorwork) I met two friends for dinner at a sushi place very near the hotel where I had some shrimp tempura and delicious miso soup - and snacked on other folks's edamame (?) Wonderful!

Today the first class, Embellishments & Buttonholes, went FABulously (you all know what I mean, those who have been in a class with me before...) and after a lovely, short walk I returned to freshen up and now I'm waiting for my Silk Corset Class (a small class, so we're up in one of the suites instead of a classroom!)

Tonight is a pajama party - I intend to take photos and blackmail folks later - and tomorrow I teach my knitting with wire class (always a blast!) And then I have some time to myself. Finally I'll get into the pool!
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posted by Annie at

2 Comments:

Blogger Jeanne said...

Hi, Annie,

About those bat-like winged thoughts... I've dealt with those myself and I found a technique that, while it sounds counter-intuitive, might just help.

It is said that what we resist, persists. The technique is this: when the fear, doubt or panicky thought arises, acknowledge it. Don't try to stop it—that will only give it strength. Instead, casually acknowledge it. Say "Oh, there it is."

Then sit with it patiently. Let it rise if it must. But LET IT. If you must fight anything, fight the urge to squash it back down and just let it ride on by, like watching a parade (or watching bats fly away). Be an outside observer of the emotions and thoughts.

What happens is that it peaks—then it dissipates. Following this is a return to calm, rational thought. Yes, it's darned scary the first time or so because you'll think it'll overtake you. But when you realize it doesn't and that once it has peaked it fades away, you'll find out as I did that the more you do it, the less the bats come back. Eventually they go live somewhere else.

Sending you vibes of peace and tranquility in the eye of the storm...

March 15, 2008 5:56 PM  
Blogger Leslie said...

You're working very hard, Annie, it comes through. You're tired and yes, you are worried about everybody at home. But by working, you're keeping the homefires burning, keeping everyone you love as safe as you can. Jeanne's right. Acknowledge the fearsome thoughts; eventually they'll get tired of trying to scare you and will go looking for an easier (more easily scared) mark.

Sending good thoughts your way.

March 16, 2008 8:23 AM  

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